Saturday, December 11, 2010

My Daddy....

Well, once again it has been months since my last post. Our lives have changed tremendously. I can't say for the best, but it is all apart of God's big plan. And I find peace in knowing that. Since my last post, WAY back in August, actually about a week after that post, my Daddy died unexpectedly. As, I type those words, I can't stop the tears from flowing. It most ways it still seems so unreal to me.

Ace started his first day of Kindergarten (September 8), it didn't go well at all. He was so overwhelmed. I felt so bad for him. So I thought I would cheer him up with a treat of his choice from the store. After we did that we came home. We weren't home but maybe 2 minutes when my phone rang. The call was from my Mom's cell phone, or as my phone says Mimi's cell. When I answered it was my Aunt and when I heard her voice I knew something horrible happened. And it had. My Mom couldn't tell me, so my Aunt did...I'll never forget those words.."Lottie, your Daddy died this morning."

How could that be, I just had talked to him a day before that! Looking back I knew that would be the last time I would talk to him. I felt it in my soul and choose not to listen to the "little voice" that told me that. His last words to me were "Hug and kiss Ace and Aaron for me. Hug Mike. And I'm hugging you right now." When I hung up with him, I cried because I knew he sounded sick. I just never realized how sick he was. My plan was to go home to visit in Septemeber, but we had pushed it back to the Summer of 2011, because I didn't want to pull the kids out of school. That is something I will always regret. I know there's a reason I changed our plans, and even though I didn't get to say goodbye to my Daddy in person, I had the best conversation with him the day before he died. The last words that he said to me are ones that I will treasure forever.


Keyona said...

*Hugs* I know it hasn't gotten any easier. I know it's something you never get over. You will learn to live with that little ache in your heart. Just remember everything happens for a reason. You got to say goodbye. You just didn't realize you were saying it. I know the holidays can be hard following a tragic loss. Hang in there lovie. Love you!

Southern Queen Bee said...

Hope you are doing well. It is so hard to lose someone, and Keyona is right you never get over it.
For me I lost me brother when he was only 23 and when the pain is so great, I just remeber that God allowed me to have him for 23 great years and we had great times together.
My advice is to cry if you need to and laugh when you think of the fun times.